Emotional set backs
Posted: February 15, 2013 Filed under: affair 4 CommentsI didn’t want to think about her recently, in fact I’ve been keeping myself so busy and concentrating on the future I see before me.
Unfortunately I cannot stop it and she has entered my mind regularly this past week.
I tell myself these feelings are something I CAN live with, I NEED to live with. I repeat to myself nothing will come of it, nothing good anyway, no matter how I may have dreamt about it.
I stupidly tell myself she tells herself the same things and feels the same but then I don’t believe it and I find myself in a vicious circle of self loathing.
The stupidity of this man, the one who writes this silly blog, holds no bounds.
Valentines day holds nothing dear to her and I yet it is meant to be the time of love. So no matter how I dress it up, I try and forget and move on but a place in my heart and soul is forever hers.
I hope you spent last night with someone you love and cherish.
A blogger in turmoil 
Yeah I get it. Tried to be 100% focussed on my spouse yesterday but did not succeed. Unrealistic thoughts of her (the OW) intruded. If I try and wall them in then I’m better for awhile but down the road when the wall is breached its just that much worse. Better for me to get used to daily thoughts that slowly dwindle in average intensity and to keep reminding myself how unrealistic the whole thing was and would be.
You can lead your heart. Your head is just that YOUR head. YOU have control over your thoughts and actions. True healing will begin once you believe this. You can have the same powerful love for your spouse, but it will take you telling your head to do so. Good first steps are to think of one thing you love about your wife each day, sometimes it is helpful to go through happy-time pictures, othertimes you can just give grace for the little things. You can develop a deep love for your spouse, but it takes time, effort, compassion and communication.
Cheers!
I’ve read your entire blog. You have wallowed in your affair for two years. Your wife doesn’t deserve your lies, and I pity your son, being raised by such a fraud.
Be a man. Admit your affair, and let your wife decide if she wants to stay with you.
And for god’s sake, do NOT have another child unless you are 100% committed to her and your family, and only after you have come clean.
Get some help at http://www.marriagebuilders.com. There are plenty of cheating husbands on there who have not only repaired their marriages but found deeper, meaningful and amazing love with their spouses.
Consider this: What if you had poured all the time and attention you spent on your pathetic affair instead on your your wife and child. You’d probably have the most rock solid marriage in the world.
I approve every comment on this blog even if they are useless or venomous.
Are you happy with yourself after writing that?